Debate: Asking Babies for Consent Before Changing Their Diapers

Diaper changing has never sparked much debate. While it can be unpleasant at times (okay, most of the time), it’s generally considered a routine, unremarkable part of parenting—necessary, messy, and rarely controversial.

That changed recently when a sexuality educator suggested that parents should ask their babies for consent before changing their diapers.

“Of course, a baby won’t respond by saying, ‘Yes, mom, that’s great, I’d love my diaper changed!’” educator Deanne Carson acknowledged. “But if you pause, look for body language, and wait for eye contact, you’re showing that their response matters.”

In an interview with Australia’s ABC News on May 8, Carson explained that she works with parents and educators to promote what she calls a “culture of consent” beginning at birth. Her approach encourages parents to speak to their newborns as if they’re part of the process—even in moments as mundane as a diaper change. That might sound like: “I’m going to change your diaper now, is that OK?”

The goal, Carson says, isn’t to gain literal permission from a newborn, but to model respectful communication early and lay the foundation for bodily autonomy as the child grows.